Thursday, September 10, 2009
Drained
I have no energy today. I worked only 1/2 day..... but after work, I went to Morgan's therapist appointment, then came home and made some phone calls. My darling husband left his debit card in the ATM machine a few days ago, so I was trying to track down the right person to see if they could find it..... and they did. Then, I had to get Morgan ready for her first dance class. Maybe that's why I'm so tired. Anyway, that's all I've got for now.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Winding Down
I'm feeling a bit more at peace than I was yesterday..... although if I'd have posted this a few hours ago, you wouldn't have seen it. Today started out dreadfully. I couldn't fall asleep last night for anything. I just don't understand it. Some days I'm just so tired all day...... but, put me in bed, and nothing. My mind starts racing and I start worrying about everything that I have to do the next day.... or the whole week.... or what I forgot to do. It's exhausting. So, I got back out of bed and stayed up a few more hours and finally fell asleep... way too late. So, this morning I was really tired from the start. Morgan was pretty easy to get motivated, thankfully and I got to work in plenty of time to take a few minutes to myself before I went inside. There, was where it went from bad to worse.
Apparently, the IT dept. (or one person of the IT dept.) did some work on the network on Friday and didn't think about how the changes would affect our credit card processor. Now, don't get me wrong.... they're all my friends... in fact, I have lunch with them every day. And, I know that nobody wanted what happened today. But, I came in to tons of cases that were taken over the weekend that we couldn't process because we didn't have the ability to process the credit cards. After lunch, we were finally able to do it manually, but that meant entering all of the information into an external site, processing, then transferring it back to our system. What used to take maybe 5 seconds, was taking several minutes. It was frustrating and exhausting. And, I know we had well over 100 of them to process. It was tedious, time-consuming work, but we finally finished what we needed to get finished and I was able to leave about 20 minutes after my normal quitting time.
When I got home, I had the kids to deal with. Katie was finishing up some homework that is due tomorrow that she could have finished over the long weekend. Instead, she didn't even start and chose to go to a movie last night instead. Now, I'm supposed to feel sorry for her and exempt her from household responsibilities because she has too much to do. And then Morgan..... she's been complaining that school is boring and too easy for her. Granted, she is very smart. And, the only gifted class they have for 4th grade is Language Arts and Reading, so that leaves a lot of time left in the day where she is not being challenged. Anyway, she was assigned Social Studies homework today, and given an extra worksheet as an extra challenge for her.... and she had a meltdown. She didn't want to do the extra work. That's so frustrating to me.... After I promised her that I would do everything I could to talk to her principal and work with her to find ways to challenge her and keep her from getting bored in school. And, I did that on Thursday..... now, we're seeing the results of that and she doesn't want to follow through. But, when I explained that I would like her to finish these worksheets without complaining, and if I did hear complaining, we would be tomorrow's homework as well, she quieted down and decided she was ready to work. She's just finishing up now.... and explaining what she learned from our President in his speech today.
So, I've cooked dinner, done a few loads of laundry, worked on homework with Morgan, and now I'm about ready for bed. I should have no trouble sleeping tonight. Let's just see if I can get Morgan to sleep in her own bed tonght.
Apparently, the IT dept. (or one person of the IT dept.) did some work on the network on Friday and didn't think about how the changes would affect our credit card processor. Now, don't get me wrong.... they're all my friends... in fact, I have lunch with them every day. And, I know that nobody wanted what happened today. But, I came in to tons of cases that were taken over the weekend that we couldn't process because we didn't have the ability to process the credit cards. After lunch, we were finally able to do it manually, but that meant entering all of the information into an external site, processing, then transferring it back to our system. What used to take maybe 5 seconds, was taking several minutes. It was frustrating and exhausting. And, I know we had well over 100 of them to process. It was tedious, time-consuming work, but we finally finished what we needed to get finished and I was able to leave about 20 minutes after my normal quitting time.
When I got home, I had the kids to deal with. Katie was finishing up some homework that is due tomorrow that she could have finished over the long weekend. Instead, she didn't even start and chose to go to a movie last night instead. Now, I'm supposed to feel sorry for her and exempt her from household responsibilities because she has too much to do. And then Morgan..... she's been complaining that school is boring and too easy for her. Granted, she is very smart. And, the only gifted class they have for 4th grade is Language Arts and Reading, so that leaves a lot of time left in the day where she is not being challenged. Anyway, she was assigned Social Studies homework today, and given an extra worksheet as an extra challenge for her.... and she had a meltdown. She didn't want to do the extra work. That's so frustrating to me.... After I promised her that I would do everything I could to talk to her principal and work with her to find ways to challenge her and keep her from getting bored in school. And, I did that on Thursday..... now, we're seeing the results of that and she doesn't want to follow through. But, when I explained that I would like her to finish these worksheets without complaining, and if I did hear complaining, we would be tomorrow's homework as well, she quieted down and decided she was ready to work. She's just finishing up now.... and explaining what she learned from our President in his speech today.
So, I've cooked dinner, done a few loads of laundry, worked on homework with Morgan, and now I'm about ready for bed. I should have no trouble sleeping tonight. Let's just see if I can get Morgan to sleep in her own bed tonght.
Monday, September 7, 2009
New Blog
I don't even know where to begin. Such is the nature of what this blog will be about. See, it all began again when I looked at a friend's blog. She is a photographer, so her photographs are stunning.... and she's clever and witty, so everyone is immediately drawn in. And, it reminded me that it has been way too long since I'd posted to my blog.... L8dybug's Journal.
I don't know what I want that blog to be about..... but it's always just been about our family.... the good things. I posted a couple of things and began reading other blogs. Then began a search for blogs that are relevant to my life. That's what brought me here.
About a month ago, I was diagnosed with ADHD. It was of no surprise to me.... especially since I was certain enough that I might have it that I went to a Psychologist for a full evaluation, including a Psych test and an IQ test. Even more is the fact that my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year as well, and everything I read tells me that it is very likely that she inherited it from one of her parents. And, now all those things about myself that I don't understand have an explanation.
I didn't want to integrate all of this into L8dybug's Journal. I want that to stay about my family.... about the good parts. To have a place for my older daughter's life that is separate from her sister's issues that have become such a part of her life. So, the only way to do that was a new blog...... and I think I should explain the title.
I was originally planning for it to be titled "Chaos and Disorder", but that title was already taken, so I changed it up a bit.... and I think this is even better. See, there is virtually no part of my life that is without disorder. My house is never in order. Yes, I have 2 kids.... but I can't seem to keep up with it all. I'm not talking pig-stye here, but I wish I could have one of those showplace homes with everything in it's place at all times. I covet that...... I feel like I'm that person on the inside. I crave order and perfection..... It drives me crazy to live with "things" all over the place. But, it's impossible for me to do it. Laundry...... I only do it once a week. I don't mind doing laundry....... I like the order of it...... the rhythm of it. I don't even mind folding it.... but I HATE putting it away. So, if I do a load each day of the week, I would have mountains all over the house that never got put away..... adding to the "things" that I can't stand being out. So, I wait until the weekend.... and it takes hours and hours to do it all...... that's if I can even get past the overwhelming feeling of dread and actually begin. (which I haven't.) Now outside. I LOVE gardening. I love to plant flowers..... love how they look and I don't mind the work it takes to clear the beds in the spring/fall to plant the bulbs/flowers. But, I don't keep up with them. I get bored of it. Once they're in, the novelty has worn off.... I'm through. Why can't I continue to enjoy all the hard work I'd done in the beginning. I have to keep lists, planners and schedules so that I don't forget things. Then, if I don't remember to look at them, I still forget. If I think of something that needs to be done, I'd better do it RIGHT NOW, or it won't get done..... or at least write it down, so I'll remember to do it later. Then, remember where I was so I can finish whatever I was working on. So, the disorder that is a constant presence in my life easily spirals into chaos..... when the appointment is forgotten...... the bill wasn't paid...... the favorite shirt wasn't washed.... I didn't make sure the homework was done..... it never ends. And, it can be looked at in another way too..... the Chaos that comes from the Disorder.....ADHD.
So now you're thinking..... this chick is crazy.... what's so difficult about cleaning, laundry and gardeng?.... well, I don't know. That's the frustrating part. I HAVE NO CLUE!!!! It shouldn't be hard. I'm just lazy, right? That's what I tell myself. But, everything I'm reading is telling me that it's the ADHD.... and I'm struggling with that now. Now, combine this with a 4th grader who has ADHD, and is also Gifted and you have my life. I've gotta go takle this laundry.
I don't know what I want that blog to be about..... but it's always just been about our family.... the good things. I posted a couple of things and began reading other blogs. Then began a search for blogs that are relevant to my life. That's what brought me here.
About a month ago, I was diagnosed with ADHD. It was of no surprise to me.... especially since I was certain enough that I might have it that I went to a Psychologist for a full evaluation, including a Psych test and an IQ test. Even more is the fact that my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year as well, and everything I read tells me that it is very likely that she inherited it from one of her parents. And, now all those things about myself that I don't understand have an explanation.
I didn't want to integrate all of this into L8dybug's Journal. I want that to stay about my family.... about the good parts. To have a place for my older daughter's life that is separate from her sister's issues that have become such a part of her life. So, the only way to do that was a new blog...... and I think I should explain the title.
I was originally planning for it to be titled "Chaos and Disorder", but that title was already taken, so I changed it up a bit.... and I think this is even better. See, there is virtually no part of my life that is without disorder. My house is never in order. Yes, I have 2 kids.... but I can't seem to keep up with it all. I'm not talking pig-stye here, but I wish I could have one of those showplace homes with everything in it's place at all times. I covet that...... I feel like I'm that person on the inside. I crave order and perfection..... It drives me crazy to live with "things" all over the place. But, it's impossible for me to do it. Laundry...... I only do it once a week. I don't mind doing laundry....... I like the order of it...... the rhythm of it. I don't even mind folding it.... but I HATE putting it away. So, if I do a load each day of the week, I would have mountains all over the house that never got put away..... adding to the "things" that I can't stand being out. So, I wait until the weekend.... and it takes hours and hours to do it all...... that's if I can even get past the overwhelming feeling of dread and actually begin. (which I haven't.) Now outside. I LOVE gardening. I love to plant flowers..... love how they look and I don't mind the work it takes to clear the beds in the spring/fall to plant the bulbs/flowers. But, I don't keep up with them. I get bored of it. Once they're in, the novelty has worn off.... I'm through. Why can't I continue to enjoy all the hard work I'd done in the beginning. I have to keep lists, planners and schedules so that I don't forget things. Then, if I don't remember to look at them, I still forget. If I think of something that needs to be done, I'd better do it RIGHT NOW, or it won't get done..... or at least write it down, so I'll remember to do it later. Then, remember where I was so I can finish whatever I was working on. So, the disorder that is a constant presence in my life easily spirals into chaos..... when the appointment is forgotten...... the bill wasn't paid...... the favorite shirt wasn't washed.... I didn't make sure the homework was done..... it never ends. And, it can be looked at in another way too..... the Chaos that comes from the Disorder.....ADHD.
So now you're thinking..... this chick is crazy.... what's so difficult about cleaning, laundry and gardeng?.... well, I don't know. That's the frustrating part. I HAVE NO CLUE!!!! It shouldn't be hard. I'm just lazy, right? That's what I tell myself. But, everything I'm reading is telling me that it's the ADHD.... and I'm struggling with that now. Now, combine this with a 4th grader who has ADHD, and is also Gifted and you have my life. I've gotta go takle this laundry.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
